Why there is no Parents’ Day in North Korea
Released by KCNA on January 1, 2023, this photo captures the moment Kim Jong-un consoles a tearful student during a group photo session with representatives of the North Korean Children’s Union in Pyongyang, following their ninth gathering.
Wednesday is eobeoi (parents) day in South Korea, where it is a national holiday. Established on May 8, 1973, it is a time for people to express their gratitude, honor the traditional virtues of respect for the elderly, and spread the culture of filial piety.
It is a festive time of gift-giving around the whole country. Gifts vary according to circumstances, but the general custom these days is to prepare flowers, money, and health supplements.
Some families use Parents’ Day as an opportunity to travel abroad with their parents, while others attend performances, travel locally, or buy expensive items at department stores.
There is, however, no Parents’ Day in North Korea. There, the leader is considered the only parent who matters.
The regime claims that its system is based on socialist principles of equal distribution, where everyone eats and lives well, and positions the leader as the parent of the entire nation. Kim Il-sung, Kim Jong-il, and now Kim Jong-un have all filled this role.
Since there cannot be any other parents besides the leader, children cannot refer to their own parents as parents.
However, the truth is that no one in North Korea considers the Kim family as the parents.
In its early days, North Korea operated a system that somewhat resembled other socialist bloc countries. People followed the instructions of the party and relied on the state’s food distribution system to survive. Despite the scarcity of food, there was no alternative but to conserve and eat sparingly.
At that time, the regime boasted of having the most superior socialist system in the world, supplying essential items such as soap, toothpaste, soy sauce, soybean paste, and shoes according to state regulations.
However, by the late 1980s, the country faced a severe crisis. The collapse of Soviet communism directly contributed to North Korea’s economic difficulties. There was no longer an international socialist market, and North Koreans could no longer rely on the ration system. Still, they had to keep working, even if it was unpaid. If they refused, they were subjected to even harsher forced labor.
The parental leader was now a dictator, a thug brandishing a gun.
Farmers toiled all year round only to have their harvests confiscated in the fall. Under the pretext of military provisions, national food plans, and patriotism, everything was plundered.
As a result, farmers now condemn Kim Jong-un more than the officially hated class of colonial era landlords. They accuse him of being even more ruthless.
This is why there is no Parents’ Day in North Korea. Instead, there is Mother’s Day. This was established by Kim in May 2012, just five months into his rule.
Some view its establishment as a sign of increased national attention to women. However, in reality, citizens interpret it as a way to emphasize the social role of women.
This was made clear in an address by Kim in which he called on women of working age to actively join the labor force and contribute their sweat and hard work. In particular, he urged women to have more children, saying that it is patriotic to have many children at home.
In essence, women are portrayed as the driving force and engine of national development. However, there is no mention of providing social or domestic privileges to women. Instead, the focus is on their dedication to the party and the leader.
The regime recently released a song about Kim called “Friendly Father” that was intended for domestic propaganda but which has gone viral internationally.
It depicts Kim as a parent figure, but in reality, those suffering from hunger and malnutrition, wandering the streets and dying in gutters, do not call the man responsible a friendly father.
Still, the song is pumped out on mobile broadcasting vehicles, in the streets and villages day and night. It dominates television and radio. Some feel such aversion to it that they refuse to watch television.
They know that as long as Kim remains in power, North Korea will never have a real Parents’ Day.
Era is a North Korean defector and an experienced journalist who offers a unique perspective on one of the world's most secretive nations. Having escaped the oppressive regime, Era has leveraged her keen understanding of North Korean society to become a beacon of truth. Through her extensive network of in-country reporters, she maintains real-time communication with sources inside North Korea, providing unparalleled insights into the ground realities of the closed society.
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